Only the Good Die Young
by elmccabe
Summary: A story of the Marauders and Lily Evans in their 7th year with lots of comedy, drama, and sweet memories
1. Chapter 1

"Smoking cigs, Evans? Bit hypocritical of you." Sirius Black said as he sat down next to her at the highest tower the astronomy department could offer.

Lily Evans twisted her long, dark red hair behind her ears as she watched the smoke swirl around her face and disperse. Her tights were a bit ripped, which suited her personality, and the multiple rings on her fingers glistened under the moonlight.

"How do you figure that?" she asked with mild interest.

Sirius glanced at her, before lighting one himself, and rolled his eyes. He loved the witch, even if he would never admit it, but Merlin could she drive a wizard mad. That wizard sometimes being himself, but more likely his best mate James.

"End of term party last year, James was smoking one in the middle of the common room when you noticed and called him a great prat. You said you'd rather not see him die young end early because of his detestable life choices." Sirius said and let out a bark like spat of laughter.

"To which James replied that only the good die young." She remembered aloud.

Lily grinned to herself at this memory. She chucked her cigarette off the top of the tower and she and Sirius watched it fade out into the black sky. He raised an eyebrow at her bold gesture before mimicking her himself.

"I don't even _like_ smoking them. I detest it actually," she said, grazing her hand on the rubble of the tower floor, "but it drove my mum round the twist. I was just missing her earlier and thought maybe if I came up here to smoke she might come back from the dead to lecture me. Stupid, I know."

Sirius shrugged, letting his dark hair fall in a curtain in front of his eyes, "Everyone deals with loss in different ways. Besides," he said with a grin, "when my parents kicked me out I dealt with it by leaving all my muggle posters of girls in bikinis up in my room."

Lily laughed too and reached over to squeeze his hand. She had always gotten along fairly well with the boys, the Marauders, and then for some reason after the incident in 5th year they had all become a lot closer. Sirius squeezed back and helped her stand up. Lily looked at him in surprise.

"Where are we going?" she asked as they started making their way back to Gryffindor tower without getting caught.

Maybe luck was on their side that night (or maybe Sirius had checked the map to see the safest route back). Or maybe since it was the first night back at school, the teachers felt they had more pressing matters at hand. Either way, Lily was glad she wasn't caught roaming the castle the first night of her 7th year, as Head Girl no less.

"The tower. James noticed you slipped out of the common room earlier and then when Mary and Marlene both didn't know where you were, I volunteered to search high and low until we found our resident house red head." He teased.

"Yeah? They tell you to lecture me on my smoking habits, too?" Lily teased back, bumping shoulders with him. "How'd you find me anyway?"

"It's not a habit if you've only done it like twice ever, Evans," Sirius said as the approached the portrait of the fat lady, "and I can't tell you all my secrets or I won't have any advantage over you."

"Wizard's chess." Lily said to the fat lady who swung open.

As she and Sirius climbed through the portrait hole she immediately saw 4 pairs of relieved eyes upon her. She resisted the chance to make fun of them for their panic before she remembered that since she was a muggleborn in the beginning of a very dangerous war, their panic wasn't exactly misplaced.

"First night back and you're already causing chaos in the corridors Lily! I knew I liked you for a reason!" Peter said, earning a few chuckles, and Lily winked at him for stopping the lecture someone was bound to give her.

"That's your job, Pete. I was just up for some nighttime wanderings." She shrugged, sitting in front of the fire at Remus' feet.

Her friends let her off the hook and resumed their conversation from before she and Sirius got back. Mary, Peter, and James all seemed to think Sprout had a crush on Flitwick while Remus and Marlene seemed horrified at the idea. Sirius was quick to input that maybe all she liked was to use him for a good shag. That sort of killed the conversation.

Lily looked across from her to James sitting in the armchair she usually liked to occupy. His tie was loosened and his shirt rolled up to his elbows, glasses resting crookedly on his nose, and his ever present grin gracing his handsome face. When he turned and made eye contact with her, neither of them looked away, entranced by the light the fire was offering, nor Remus talking to James could pull them both out of the trance.

Later, to her friends, Lily would blame it on missing her mom and the exhaustion of the train ride. Later, to his friends, James would insist they were having a moment right in front of their very eyes. Neither party seemed inclined to believe their friend.

While the 7th years girls were getting ready for bed, a soft mummer of conversation buzzed around the room. Mary, Marlene, and Lily's other two roommates Millie and Pippa asked about everyone's summer vacations. The 5 of them had always gotten along well, choosing to split off their separate ways, but always staying involved with one another. Millie and Pippa hung out often with the Hufflepuffs and always kept the other three girls relevant on the gossip from other houses. Mary, Marlene, and Lily would in turn keep the two in tune to whatever the Marauder's were planning so they could stay away.

"Sirius' hair is much too long," Pippa, observed, plaiting her long dirty blonde hair, "I expect it's because he thinks himself too punk to follow the rules."

Lily felt a rush of affection for the girl. Pippa liked to casually throw out comments about Sirius now and again; recovering from a crush she had on him circa 5th year, as if to assure them she was over him. They all knew she had moved on since she started dating her Hufflepuff boyfriend, but since they hung out with Sirius she didn't want it to be weird.

"What we really should be discussing," Millie said joining the conversation as she unpacked, "is how good looking James got over the summer. He's still mad about you Lils, that much is obvious, but now even you can't deny his good lucks."

Lily paused where she was brushing her teeth, and let the toothpaste harden on her cheek, and Marlene grinned at the sight of her. Mary was trying to be nice and hide her smile, but even her curtains couldn't block her all the way. Pippa chuckled at her best friend.

"Yes, I suppose I can't," Lily sighed, wondering if she was going to regret her next statement, "most of the time I even find myself enjoying hanging out with him."

"That much is obvious," Marlene snorted, climbing into her bed next to Lily, "we all see the way you immediately look for each other when you walk into a room."

"Don't make a mountain out of a molehill Mar," Mary chided from the other side of Lily's bed, "or Lily may never admit to fancying that bloke."

"Damn shame if you ask me." Millie added in.

"Why is it always my love life we discuss? What about you guys?" Lily protested.

"Oh Lily," Pippa laughed not unkindly, "Yours is just so much more interesting than ours."

The girls were all inclined to agree.

"She was _smoking_?" James asked incredulously, "After she called me a prat for it?"

"I reminded her of that actually," Sirius, yawned, pulling on his maroon sweatpants and a hollyhead harpies t-shirt, "She didn't seem to give a shit. Said it was because she missed her mom."

"I doubt Lily is turning into a chain-smoker, Prongs," Remus said quietly from his trunk across the room, "She's just sad."

"She's not so sad anymore," Peter, said thoughtfully, "I think sometimes it just creeps up on her, you know? Like she remembers and it hits her full force."

"I cannot believe I'm going to listen to another entire year of discussing Lily Evans," Matthew Johnson, their 5th roommate groaned, "Can you just snog the witch and move on already?"

Matthew had the unfortunate luck of being the 5th Gryffindor boy their year. He generally didn't participate in anything with his other roommates, despite how clever the rest of the school thought them. He didn't have a problem with them but he was never included in their little club either.

"Shut it, Johnson," James snapped, his hair sticking up in ten different directions without his hand to tame it, "Until you snog Millie you have no room to be cheeky with me about Lily."

"I have snogged Millie." The boy pointed out.

"In that case, she doesn't seem to keen to repeat the experience." James snorted.

Remus laughed and shook his head at his dorm mates. They all settled into their four-poster beds, delightfully toasty from the warming pans the house elves put in, and let it soak in for a moment that they were finally home again.

"Look at the bright side." Peter said when they all settled down.

"What are you talking about Wormtail?" Remus asked.

Matthew had long since accepted their strange nicknames that made no sense.

"Think of all the alone time Prong will spend with Lily this year as heads." He snickered.

"Oh my God someone kill me." Matthew moaned.


	2. Chapter 2

"James." Lily said stepping into the Head's office.

He wasn't paying attention of course, far more wrapped up in some piece of parchment but Lily swore he never looked so handsome to her than when he didn't know she was looking. Maybe it was because all the pretenses fell away.

"James," she repeated and he looked up at her and had to focus and she could tell his mind was far away, and she found herself wondering where he went in those moments in his head, "The prefects need their schedules for rounds by tonight. Mind helping me?"

"Course not Evans," he smiled, shoving some papers out of the way and making room for her on the table, and she noticed the parchment he was studying so intensely had gone blank, "Can't have the prefects unhappy."

She laughed and he seemed pleased about it. He took in her converse (that were definitely not apart of the uniform at Hogwarts), he plaited red hair, and the smudged pen on her hand that always seemed to be there once term started. His mouth quirked up when he realized how much he noticed about her.

"So we just need to pair people up, sometimes with other prefects from their houses and sometimes from others, and set the times. There's a charm on this piece of paper and once we set it all of their schedules will change." She explained.

"Seems a bit unfair," James said looking at the list of names Lily was holding, "That we have to force kids of other houses to work with Slytherins, the prats."

"I know but duty calls." Lily said and winked at him.

James felt his stomach soar. All summer, every aching moment, he had spent trying to convince himself friendship with Lily Evans was enough. Because he loved her, he really loved her and that scared him, but she didn't feel the same way. And he cared about her too much to lose her altogether but he never imagined sitting here with her, laughing with her, being close enough to touch her, and being her friend. It didn't seem fair.

One Slytherin name in particular seemed to jump out at them, however unpleasant that may be. James had never liked him, despised him even, but after 5th year mostly left him alone. Of course, neither boy was innocent.

Lily knew they would have to talk about Severus at some point. James hated him and these days, Lily could hardly blame him. That didn't stop her from missing him like a bad toothache though; some things were just destined to hurt a little bit more than other things.

"So do you ever have to patrol with Snape?" James asked, knowing she would prefer him to call him by his first name, but accepting it instead of risking him calling him Snivellus.

Lily winced slightly, but when she spoke her voice was steady, and she looked James right in the eyes, "No. Everyone felt bad after he called me a mudblood in front of half the school and didn't force me to patrol with him."

"I'm so sorry about that day Evans," James started and had to stop his voice from going hoarse because he still felt _so guilty_ , "I would have never done anything if I thought-"

"No, but it happened all the same yeah? 'Sides, I'm not mad. You apologized and we moved on." She said and bumped knees with him to let him know she wasn't upset anymore.

They worked on the patrol schedule in silence for a while. Every now and then one of them would correct the other's mistake or pause to think. The afternoon went relatively smoothly. They chatted about first day back of lessons and Lily asked James when he would have Quidditch try-outs. When they were finished they began to walk back to the tower together. Hence, chaos ensuing.

They were almost back to the tower when the pair ran into Amos Diggory. Diggory was the Hufflepuff Quidditch captain and the prefect everyone thought would have been made Head Boy. When James saw him he tensed up, ran his hands through hair, and stood closer to Lily. Whatever Amos wanted, it probably had to do with Lily.

"Lily! I was just looking for you." He said and pretended he didn't see James.

"You went all the way to Gryffindor tower from the kitchens? Did you have a question about patrols?" she asked him.

James smirked when Amos' face fell, although only slightly. Clearly he thought Lily would have been more excited about the fact that he was looking for her. He was no Sirius, but plenty of girls fancied him.

"No actually I just wanted a word. Do you mind?" he motioned to James to give them a moment.

Lily seemed to have caught on to the situation at hand. She stepped away from Amos and backwards closer towards James.

"Sorry Amos, James was just walking me back to the common room. I'd hate to make him leave and wait for me." She apologized and James had never felt so satisfied by such a casual conversation.

"No matter then. Look, I was wondering if you-"

"Prongs! Evans!" Peter screeched, turning the corner and running down the corridor towards them, "You might want to get out of here."

He slowed down when he was closer and bent over panting. Lily watched James pat him on the back with an amused smirk and knew he found this situation hilarious. Watching Amos squirm and getting to see Lily deny him would absolutely make his term.

"Do you _mind_ , Pettigrew? I was trying to ask Lily if she wanted-"

"Peter! Did you not warn them?" Remus asked, flying around the corner next.

He was in better shape than Peter, but not by much. He was breathing heavily as he encroached upon the group and grasped the wall for support. Lily was very aware how out of hand the situation had gotten for poor Amos.

"Warn us about what?" James raised his eyebrow.

"Sirius let loose a dungbomb right in front of the Great Hall." Remus explained, "And Flich was chasing us when we lost him by the Prefect's bathroom."

"Why would Sirius do that?" Lily giggled.

"He swears it was an accident but seeing as it was Sirius-" Peter started.

"It was no accident." James finished, beginning to laugh as well. "I'm guessing we don't want to be found by Filch right now?"

Remus nodded. The four Gryffindors turned to walk away, forgetting all about the Hufflepuff standing there when he coughed loudly and Lily regretfully turned around.

"Sorry Amos, with all the chaos I forgot you wanted to talk," Lily said not unkindly, "What's up?"

"I just wanted to know if this weekend you wanted to-"

"FILCH IS COMING!" Sirius screamed, rounding the corner, grabbing Lily's hand and sprinting, the rest of the group following suit.

Over the laughter of her friends, and trying to not seem too happy about escaping the unfortunate conversation, Lily turned her head over her shoulder as she was running, "Sorry Amos! Catch up later!"

James found himself not feeling very sorry at all. When they were finally safely in the common room, they found it very much deserted, they collapsed on the couches and dissolved into a childlike laughter. When they finally calmed down, Lily made way to go to bed when Sirius stopped her.

"Diggory asking you out, Evans?"

"More like trying to ask her out." Peter sniggered.

Lily rolled her eyes to cover up the slight blush rising in her cheeks. She could feel James watching her out of the corner of her eye.

"Poor bloke didn't stand a chance." Remus said.

"What were you going to say had we not saved your arse from that miserable idea?" Sirius pressed.

"Guess we'll never know. Night boys." Lily said and with that, finally went to sleep.

James didn't stop smiling all night.


	3. Chapter 3

History of magic was known school wide as the world's most boring subject taught by the world's most boring teacher. He had potential to be interesting, oh yes, seeing as he was a ghost. But he let them down everytime they entered the classroom and subjected themselves to an entire lesson of horribly boring lectures.

Lily and Marlene sat in the second row so Binns wouldn't see them working on essays for potions. Mary would give them her notes as always, seeing as she usually managed to stay awake for the main focus of their teacher's lectures, and in turn they would help her later in potions. The system proved steady for years. Everyone thrived, and Lily and Marlene didn't have to try and keep their eyes open when Binns was talking.

In the row behind them, Sirius and Remus were playing tic tac toe on a piece of parchment while Peter drooled in his nap. James alone was listening to the teacher. He was half concentrated on taking notes (he was more studious than he ever got credit for) and half concentrated on the way the sunlight reflected in Lily's hair. It was so long now that it tumbled down her back and curled at the ends. James had never seen hair like that, never thought hair would matter. But everything mattered, at least when it came to her.

After Remus had won the game for the fourth time in a row, Sirius swore and gave up. He never learned patience in that game and had beaten Remus only twice ever. In 4th year, James made a plaque for Remus titled "Ever Reigning King of Tic Tac Toe; Never to Experience Failure at the Hand of Sirius Black". Sirius threw it off the astronomy tower the next day.

Sirius looked up and decided his efforts would be best concentrated elsewhere, mainly the two witches sitting directly in front of him. He shot James a devilish smirk before whispering, or merely talking quietly enough for Binns to not hear, to Lily in front of him.

"Evans," he said and watched as her mouth quirked in a half smile without turning around, ink smudged on the side of her hand, "you coming with me to Quidditch try outs after lessons?"

"And why would I do that?" Lily said, angling her body slightly sideways towards the boys, gaining Marlene's attention as well.

James hand was itching to mess up his hair but he refrained. Things had been going well with Lily lately and he didn't fancy having her call him a prat for it. It was just natural at this point anyway. Lily watched him slide the small leather bracelet on his wrist up and down in boredom.

All four boys had them, the leather etched with their respective nicknames, seeing as Mrs. Potter had gotten them all one for Christmas the previous year. Marlene had teased them mercilessly about it but they all seemed to like them too much to give a damn about what she said.

"Because," Sirius rolled his eyes dramatically, "I will be bored to tears watching Prongs fight off the numerous birds trying out solely because he is captain. Remus and Peter never take the mickey out of him for it like I do."

"Fuck off, Padfoot." James said grinning.

"You kiss your mother with that mouth, Potter?" Lily quipped.

"You'd like it if he kissed you with that mouth wouldn't you Lils?" Remus said, putting himself in the conversation, eyes sparkling as he teased her.

Lily's face burned and all four boys enjoyed watching her squirm. Even though she and James were actually good mates now, they all still held faith in the two of them becoming more than friends. Ever since the beginning of last summer, they'd been teasing her about it with not very subtle hints.

"Back to the conversation we were having-" Marlene started when Sirius cut her off.

"You actually weren't involved in that one." Sirius pointed out.

She shot him a dirty look, her brown eyes narrowing, and tossed her dark hair over her shoulder.

"Lily is coming to Quidditch today but to watch _me_ , not that prat." She said pointing at James.

"Who says I put you back on the team McKinnon?" James asked.

"You'd rather eat a sock than have to replace me with one of those other pathetic Chasers, Potter." She snapped back.

"Lily kissing James before or after he eats the sock then?" Peter asked and the whole group burst out laughing.

Mary turned around with a pained expression on her face. She wished she was back there sitting with them, but someone had to take the notes, and if she didn't she would be failing potions too. She grinned slightly though, at her friends rambunctious behavior.

"How about it Evans?" James said, smiling at her in the way only he could.

She tried to control the butterflies going wild in her stomach. She tried to stop the silly smile from taking over her face. She tried to not play with the half moon charm on her necklace like she did when she was nervous or thinking. She tried to stop herself from slightly blushing. All of this she tried but did not succeed in.

"In your dreams Potter." She said, not unkindly.

"That's for sure." He winked and with that, Lily promptly turned around.

Later on, when James and Marlene were on the pitch Lily, Mary, and the three other Marauders dutifully tramped up to the stands to watch the impending shit show. It was notorious now that crowds come to watch the Gryffindor team hold tryouts. The other houses came to spy. Girls ranging from all ages to all houses came giggling with their friends to try out for the good looking seventh year. Fights broke out between the kids who made the team and who didn't. No matter what James did, even having McGonagall chaperone once, these things happened. It was sort of like a comedy show.

At first everything seemed fine. The returning players quickly accepted positions on the team and stood behind their captain as he tried to fill in the open three spots on the team. They were looking for a keeper, another chaser to compliment he and Marlene, and a beater. Their seeker, Aiden Walsh, was a sixth year that was prone to kissing many girls and breaking their hearts. James was watching him out of the corner of his eye; he had a feeling he was going to cause problems today.

"Either of you ever kissed Walsh?" Peter asked when Walsh started flying circles high above, despite no one else having mounted a broom yet.

"Absolutely not." Lily blanched and then tried to stop herself, making it look like she was going to be very sick, because she forgot Mary _had_ kissed him.

"Just once," Mary squeaked, "And it was the night Sirius brought four bottles of Firewhisky to the common room on Easter."

"That was a good night." Sirius said thoughtfully, recalling the time he made six kids in his own house throw up from being so intoxicated. "I did a good job with that one."

Below, the remaining kids were starting to fly up and around the pitch. James sat gracefully and confidently on his own broom in the center, observing everyone with a face as serious as he could. Lily bit her lip, trying not to think about just how good he looked doing it. Remus made a mental note to tell James how obvious her attraction to him was. He knew more than anyone how well they would go together, if only spending copious amounts of time with both over the years.

As the night went on, the chaos steadily grew. It had been two hours and James had been unable to finish the tryouts. It had started when a few younger girls burst into tears promptly after James told them he was sorry but no, they weren't on the team. Then, Sirius saw Regulus across the stands and let out a steady stream of curse words. James, hearing his best friend and looking at the cause of commotion, missed a bludger than flew and hit him in the back of the head.

Once Marlene flew over to steady him the tryouts continued. One fourth year boy, scared to death by Marlene flying next to him, crashed into a goalpost and had to be escorted into the hospital room. Finally, after James had selected his three new members a group of girls approached Walsh and all attempted to hex him at once.

They had all been talking while waiting for their turn to tryouts. Turns out, he had written them carbon copies of the same letters all summer. After the hexing, he looked like a creature out of a horror movie. James called Lily and Remus down and they managed to reverse most of the damage; he still had to go to the hospital wing.

When they all made their way to dinner, James and Lily somehow ended up alone in the castle corridors. He was sweaty, strong, and his eyes shined like they always did after Quidditch. Lily twisted her hands together so she wouldn't feel the urge to lean over and take his hand before snogging him.

Lily's eyes were wide and sparkling, like they always did after she laughed too hard for too long. James supposed it must have been from watching Walsh get hexed; Lily, being a feminist, didn't look too fondly on boys like him. James remembered the look of panic and care on her face when he got hit with the bludger, and tried to think of something else so he wouldn't lean over and snog her.

"Good job out there captain." Lily smiled up at him; he was rather tall, when they stopped outside the great hall.

"Plenty of entertainment for you, I hope?" James asked.

"The real entertainment will come from watching the team you just put together try and beat Ravenclaw's team this year." She teased.

"You wound me, Evans," James said, collapsing against the wall and clutching his heart, "How will I go on knowing you think that?"

"You two are pathetic," Peter commented as he walked past and into dinner, "Sirius will be delighted when I tell him you're missing dinner to stay out here and talk."

"Don't make me hex you, Pete." Lily winked as he walked away.

James did a sweeping motion into the great hall, his eyes never leaving hers, "After you my lady."


	4. Chapter 4

"You're hair looks like shit Evans," Sirius told her, sitting down next to her for breakfast, "It's as tangled as James tries to make his look, I daresay."

As the rest of the boys sat down, Mary and Marlene scooted over to make room, and Lily glared at Sirius with bags under her eyes. He ignored her as he popped a piece of toast in his mouth and began to pile more food on his plate.

Seeing as he ignored the look his redheaded friend was giving him, he also failed to notice her pick up the wand that she had placed beside her plate. His mouth was suddenly full of soap and bubbles and he spit the piece of toast he was eating onto the ground. Lily grinned at him under the mess of her hair.

"What was _that_ for?" Sirius gasped once the bubbles finally stopped.

"Wash your mouth," Marlene said and rolled her eyes at Sirius missing Lily's obvious point with her charm, "Although he's right Lily, you do look more worn out than usual."

"Do I usually look worn out?" Lily inquired as she used a charm to detangle her hair.

James stared in fascination. Was there anything this witch couldn't do to capture his attention? He thought casually to himself, she could probably wear a trashbag and he would still be attracted to her.

"I think what our unsubtle, rude friends were wondering is if everything was okay." Remus said as he took a sip of his coffee, sleeves pooling around his skinny wrists per usual.

"Evans and I were up late last night together." James offered casually, trying to stick up for the witch.

What he didn't realize is that every other party at the table would raise their eyebrows at the implications of that comment or that Lily's face would turn darker than her hair.

"Patrolling! We were up late patrolling!" Lily sputtered as her friends laughed at her obvious discomfort.

The rest of breakfast passed with no other awkward confrontations. It wasn't until math later, after Sirius earned his first detention, after James returned from Quidditch, after Lily spent two hours in the library with Mary and Marlene, after Peter demolished Remus in gobstones, did the real events of the day unfold.

Most everyone had gone to sleep. The thunderstorm that had started earlier was still raging. Cracks of thunder and bright lights of lightning illuminated the windows. Lily Evans was in a pair of boxer shorts and a t- shirt promoting "The Beatles" when James Potter saw her.

He wasn't even looking for her this time, honest. Well, he was in the kitchen getting a late night snack and when he checked the map on the way back he saw her name in the common room. When she saw him standing in front of her it wasn't the way his muscles pulsed on his forearms that she noticed, nor his ink black her messed up in a way that made him particularly attractive, no she noticed the way he was intently staring at her before she pulled up her legs and he sat down next to her on the couch.

"Never took you for a liar, Evans." He said evenly, waiting for her reaction.

"Beg pardon?"

"A liar. Someone who doesn't tell the truth," he said, not breaking eye contact.

"I understand what you meant. I don't, however, understand why you think I'm a liar." She said, her lips turning down in a frown.

"I covered for you this morning at breakfast." James shrugged.

"Meaning?" Lily said, her voice getting dangerously low.

"Meaning we finished patrols early, remember? If you were tired from being up late last night, it certainly wasn't with me," James said and leaned back casually.

"However _kind_ it was for you to cover for me, without me asking by the way, where I was is none of your business." Lily hissed.

"I wasn't trying to pick a fight, Evans!" James said, his eyes wild as he followed her train of thought, "I worded this all wrong. What I really mean is, are you okay?"

Lily hadn't been expecting such an honest, soft comment from James Potter. But, she mused; he did have a way of surprising her when she least expected it. She would never stop finding this boy fascinating.

"I'm fine," Lily waved her hand, "I was just studying in the library."

James wished she didn't say that. Because, well, to be honest, last night he did check the map to see where she was. He remembered how put on he had been when he saw she was with Amos Diggory in the library, the way his heart sunk, and the way the disappointment set in making it hard for him to sleep. He knew he shouldn't have been spying on her but he couldn't help it. Love makes you do crazy things.

"With anyone in particular?" James murmured without realizing he spoke out loud.

Lily's face got red, and James knew this was about to be one very honest, very awkward conversation. He idly wondered when Amos had asked her out again after that night and why Lily said yes when she looked like she wanted to say no.

"Alright, I give in. I was studying with Amos." She surrendered.

"Diggory?" James asked pretending to be shocked, "Thought you had better taste than him."

"He's persistent," Lily shrugged, "He found me a few days after he saw us together and said he wouldn't give up until I at least hung out with him once. The library was a compromise."

"Persistent, Evans? You go on a date with a bloke because he's persistent? Have you no moral?" James said dramatically. "Besides, I'm fairly sure you didn't fall for that line when I used it on you fifth year."

"Well, I wasn't very fond of you fifth year was I?" Lily asked back

"And now? How do you feel about me now?" James said.

He leaned in very close when he asked this. So close, in fact, Lily could see everything in his hazel eyes and he could count the freckles on her face. Both of their breathing slowed down and their hearts sped up. Lily suddenly remembered they were in the common room and hastily leaned backwards. James was pleased to see she seemed to be restraining herself.

"You're not so bad, Potter." Lily smiled.

"You know what? You're not so bad either, Evans."


	5. Chapter 5

"Mary," Lily said suddenly looking up at her friend across the table in the library, "what do you supposed you'd do after Hogwarts?"

Mary put her quill down, smoothed her uniform skirt, and gazed carefully at Lily. She twisted her blonde hair behind her ears and maintained her look of always being very put together.

"I'm going to be a healer, you know that Lils," Mary said gently, assuming this was more of Lily thinking out loud than really inquiring.

"And the war?" Lily prompted, her hair falling over her eyes, the ink from her essay still wet and staining her hand when she wasn't paying attention.

"I don't really know," Mary said, quietly, for she knew it wasn't a taboo subject, but it was much more delicate to her and Lily than the others, those not stemming from a long line of purebloods, "I suppose do what I can to survive."

"It's bullshit Mare," Lily said angrily, "That we're punished because our parents are muggles. You can heal anyone better than any pureblood I've met and you aren't a tenth generation famous family like Sirius or James or Marlene."

"Discussing politics and my family in one conversation? Feels like the sort of thing I ought to be here for." Marlene said, plopping down next to Lily.

Her parchment and quills overflowing from the top of her bag, her eyes surrounded by impeccable makeup rolling her eyes at her two best friends, and her too short skirt riding up as she crossed her legs.

"Does it even matter?" Lily murmured, using the pretense of scratching out lines in her essay to hide her frown, "We're fucked either way."

"Stop being dramatic Lils." Marlene said rolling her eyes.

"Marlene, hush." Mary said quietly, watching the rage encompass Lily's face.

"Easy for you to say Marlene!" Lily exploded quietly so the whole library wouldn't overhear, "You don't have to worry whether your wand is going to be snapped or if you're going to be cursed because your mum can't do magic!"

"Piss off, Lily! You know just as well as I do that my family is in danger too for being blood traitors." Marlene hissed.

"Yes but they'll still give you a chance! We just get shot straight to hell for this! We get the brunt of the pain. I didn't ask for this Marlene, I didn't ask to be lower than anyone else just because I didn't know I was magic until I was eleven." Lily said.

Instead of responding, Marlene pulled out her wand and stuffed the rest of her stuff back into her bag. She shoved her chair back under the desk and stalked off, her anger brewing. She knew in the back of her mind Lily was right but she wasn't in the mood to listen.

Sirius passed her in the hallway and winced when she shot him a nasty look. He looked annoyed, but not altogether surprised, and made his way to the back of the library where he could clearly hear Lily's pissed of rant he was sure had to do with Marlene.

"That you screaming bloody murder Evans?" Sirius grinned, leaning against the bookshelf casually.

"Go away Sirius." Mary warned him, her blue eyes widely imploring her get away while he can.

"No can do, Mare," he said, waving her off, "I am a champion of the people. They cry out and I come calling, it's just how it works."

Mary hadn't the slightest idea what Sirius was talking about but didn't bother telling him that. He had a flare for dramatics that challenged Marlene's.

"Are you here to tell me I'm being dramatic because I'm pissed about the way muggleborns are treated?" Lily asked coolly, raising her eyebrow.

"Ah, Evans, even I'm not that big of a prat." He said subtly, alluding to what he assumed caused Marlene to flee the library.

"I snapped at Marlene," Lily said, quietly in an embarrassed manner, "I didn't mean to fight with her I'm just tired and pissed off. I should apologize."

Mary nodded and got back to her work, giving her best friend a warm smile. Sirius put a hand on her shoulder when she passed, and drew her into one of the isles to talk privately.

"I know I'm not good at this sort of thing," he said waving his hands around, "But, uh, don't let us obnoxious purebloods get you down, alright? You're twice the witch I am."

"I hope so, seeing as you're a wizard," Lily grinned and hugged Sirius, "but thanks Sirius. That means a lot coming from you."

"Lily! Sirius!" Peter said, jumping when he saw them embracing in the isle, "What are you guys doing?"

"Fighting the patriarchy, what about you Wormtail?" Sirius said easily, casually stepping back from Lily so he wouldn't get the wrong idea.

"Looking for a book for my Herbology essay," Peter shrugged, the suspicion leaving his face, "I haven't even started."

"Just snog a smart witch and have her do it." Sirius shrugged and Lily shot him a look, "Sorry Lils, pretend you didn't hear that."

"Just when I thought you were growing up." Lily teased.

"I'm not perfect Evans," Sirius allowed solemnly, "Although I'm as close as it gets."

"You can't let him get started on rants about his perfection Lily or he'll never shut up." Peter warned her and Lily agreed, walking past them and giving them each a comfortable squeeze on the hand as she did so.

When she walked out of the isle she collided with someone and they both fell to the ground, books everywhere and already forming bruises on foreheads.

"Shit." Lily groaned, leaning back against the wall, hand clutching her forehead.

"What the hell are you doing running into people?" James asked, and Lily realized she didn't even know it was him that she hit.

"Do you guys do everything together?" Lily half groaned, half laughed at the site of them.

"What's that supposed to mean?" James said, leaning opposite her against the books.

"Funny finding you guys here." Sirius said as he and Peter strode out, looking at the two of them on the floor.

"That's what that means," Lily said gesturing to his two friends. "If you guys are trying to corner me in the library, try and make it less obvious next time."

Peter said "dully noted" at the same time James asked "who is trying to corner you in here?"

"Evans' had her knickers in a twist and I was simply being an upstanding bloke and helping her talk out her issues rationally." Sirius said smirking.

"Why are your knickers in a twist?" James asked Lily who rolled her eyes.

"You try and have a conversation with one person and suddenly all of Hogwarts is giving you their input!" Lily laughed.

"You have a lot of issues," Sirius said, "It takes an army to sort through them. Just think of us as your personal cavalry, at your disposal."

Lily took in the scene around her. Peter, arms full of books on magical fungi, smiling sincerely at her. Sirius, badass and careless, winking at her and then she saw James. James, glasses sideways, a bruise already forming, and gazing at her in a sincere way that pulled at her heartstrings. It was then that she finally burst into the long overdue tears she had been holding in.

"Bloody hell, what happened here?" Remus said.

"Oh God, you do, you guys do actually do everything together!" Lily exclaimed, "Merlin, my head hurts.

"Yeah well it's killing me." Sirius snickered.

"That's not how the joke goes Padfoot," Peter laughed, "It's your face is killing me."

"So, is anyone going to tell me why Evans knickers' are in a twist?" James asked, putting his hand out to help her up.

"McKinnon's prat self told Evans she was being dramatic for being upset about the way muggleborns are treated." Sirius explained.

All three boys cringed. They knew muggleborns were treated unfairly and they knew it was a very serious subject with Lily. Why her best friend would be unkind about it, they would surely never know.

"I've got to go now, pleasure talking to you all," Lily said sarcastically, hurrying out of the library.

She made it all of eight steps (she counted) out of the library before she heard the pounding footsteps and dulcet tones of James Potter calling her name. She stopped only because she knew how persistent he could be. He was annoying, yes, but also a very loyal friend. She supposed it was the Gryffindor in him.

"What can I do for you Headboy?" Lily asked.

"Are you okay?" he asked, his windswept hair a little bit distracting for Lily.

"I'm fine," she said tensely, knowing what he was about to bring up, "I'm used to it you know? The whole anti-muggleborn thing."

James looked angry and sad and he looked like he didn't know how to control either thing. Lily watched his hands clench up and she was swept up in a wave of admiration for the boy.

" _Don't_ say things like that Evans," he said and absentmindedly ran his hand through his hair, "I can't hear you say things like that."

"James," Lily sighed, reaching out and touching his arm, and he visibly relaxed, "I'm sorry. But a long time ago I stopped feeling sorry for myself and decided I would just be realistic."

"Evans you are _everything_. You are brilliant and beautiful and funny and kind-" he said fiercely before Lily cut him off.

"James," she said softly before hugging him tightly. He wrapped his arms around her and placed his chin on her shoulder. They didn't know then what they know now, but they knew something changed.


	6. Chapter 6

Lily realized she should be doing homework. She realized she should be doing patrol schedules. She realized she could be talking with Marlene (they had long since made up from their fight, both tearfully embracing later) and Mary. But she decided, instead, to focus her energies on beating Remus in Wizard's Chess in the common room that Friday night.

"Knight to E4." She commanded and watched her chess piece saunter across the board, glaring at Remus' pieces. She must have made a mistake though because he was soon crushed and dragged off the board. "Merlin, I'm shit at this game."

"You aren't," Remus said right away, his thoughtful eyes reflected back at her in the fire, "You just act impulsively. You need to be patient and think it through."

Lily couldn't help but think of a boy with messy hair. She wondered where her impulsive attitude was when it concerned him. Why did the thought of fancying him make her knees weak? Why was her Gryffindor courage failing her?

"You don't seem to have a problem winning though either." She grumbled as he took another one of her pieces.

He laughed at her pouting, "When you grow up around James you learn to win at _something._ "

"He does seem to be good at everything doesn't he?" Lily wondered. "Top marks, Quidditch Captain, Head Boy, clever."

"I didn't realize you noticed." Remus said lightly, abandoning their game and regarding his friend curiously.

"Be a bit oblivious if I didn't see that." She said

"You aren't known to be oblivious," Remus agreed, "Although, with some matters-"

"Hullo Lily," Mary said sitting next to her on the couch, "Remus."

Lily wondered what Remus had meant when he brought up her being oblivious. She wasn't an idiot. She knew James used to fancy her a great deal. But that was years ago. So what did he mean? Surely he had gotten over her. She knew with matters of the heart you had to be cautious with whom you trust. She had learned that lesson once and it was very painful. She wasn't keen to repeat it.

"Hi Mary." Remus smiled, "How are you?"

"Fine," she waved her arm, "Lily, Amos Diggory was telling Sean you guys were dating earlier in their common room."

Sean was Pippa's boyfriend and Lily was sure Pippa had told Mary to inform Lily. It seemed absurd to Lily that Diggory would be spreading that rumor after one date but it was Amos Diggory after all and he was used to getting what he wanted.

"Funnily enough Amos must have forgotten to tell _me_ that." Lily mused.

"Well, yes, because once he did it would no longer be true." Remus added.

"It's already not true," Mary laughed and then turned serious, "Wait it isn't true right Lily?"

"Of course it's not true," Lily, said throwing her hands up in the air, "I would never date Amos Diggory."

"Yes because he's a giant prat and you're much too good for him." Sirius said appearing through the portrait hole across the room, he must have heard her declaration. "Plus, I would never approve."

James and Peter followed him scrambling through to add their own input to the conversation of Lily's love life (once again).

"I take it back. I'm going to date him just to spite you, Black." Lily said, twisting her rings and trying to sit in such a way that the boys wouldn't see all the tears in her tights.

"Cheeky, Evans." He said and took the one of the last armchairs. Peter sat next to him and James was forced to sprawl his long legs out on the floor, leaning against Sirius' armchair. "But you wouldn't do it."

"Why is that?" she asked and watched him smirk at her, his eyes lighting up at the idea of teasing her.

"I have it in good information you're interested in another bloke."

For once Lily's face didn't go red and for that she was thankful. She managed to keep her composure but the rest of the group was clearly intrigued. Mary had a very good idea of whom Lily liked but she tried to be casual too and just merely raised her eyebrows. Peter though leaned forward in an interested manner, James ran his hand through his hair and played with his hands all while staring at her, and Remus just look surprised.

"I hope that good information isn't Marlene, Sirius. Because we all know she only says those things for attention." Lily smiled.

He laughed but she could see in his eyes that he knew something and wouldn't let it go. He was letting her off easy because her friends were around (which she was thankful for). Remus caught the vibe and purposefully moved the conversation away from Lily's dating life to their transfiguration homework.

She caught James' eye a few times and she could tell he wanted to talk. And when he reminded her they had to patrol that night- something she had nearly forgotten- she was nervous and excited for their few hours together walking the halls. Sirius gave her a smirk as she left and Mary exchanged a wink with Peter.

They walked quietly for a few minutes and the static between them was palpable. Lily didn't know if she should bring the Amos thing up or let it go. But it seemed to bother him. She didn't want him thinking she was interested in _Amos_ or anyone else for that matter. She hated playing games and when she finally got up the courage to tell him she liked him she would do it right away.

"Um, James," she said and twisted her rings, "You know I don't like Amos right?"

"I figured as much actually." He said and smiled at her.

"Er, sorry. You what?" she asked, excepting a much different reaction.

He gazed at her and it made it feel as if he could see straight into her heart, into her hopes. He messed up his hair and finally spoke.

"I just mean that were friends," he said and paused, "So I sort of figured you would tell me if you liked a bloke."

"You're right." She said quietly and got caught up in her own thoughts again.

"Besides," James said cracking a grin, "If you went steady with Diggory the rest of Hogwarts would lose hope in the idea of true love."

Lily laughed but she had no idea what he meant, "How so?"

"Evans! Don't be so humble," James said flaring up his taste for dramatics, "Everyone knows most of the blokes here would give an arm and a leg for a trip to Hogsemeade with you!"

"And the witches," Lily played along, "Have been brewing love potions to perfection for months thinking if they slip you some you'll invite them over at Hols."

"It's hard being a picture of perfection but someone has to do it." He said solemnly and Lily laughed, their hands accidently grazing.

They were going to continue when they heard giggling from a nearby broom closet. James looked delighted at finding out who would be in there. Lily was wondering which house they would have to take points from and desperately hoping it wasn't Gryffindor. Sirius and Peter had lost them 50 just the other day that had yet to be made up.

James pulled out his wand and cast alohamora to open the door. Marlene and a dark haired boy spilled out, giggling and making sure they were all covered. When Marlene saw it was Lily and James' who caught her she only laughed harder. The boy appreciated her blonde hair and lengthy legs under her skirt as she stood up.

"Hey Lils." She smiled angelically.

The boy didn't even look embarrassed but rather pleased. He looked like he was glad someone saw he was actually in a broom closet with Marlene McKinnon. Lily noticed his blue tie and docked Ravenclaw 5 points before sending him off.

"Third time we've caught you since term started back up McKinnon. Impressive." James smiled.

They were family friends and often acted more like brother and sister than classmates. He loved to tease her about boys, an area in which she was shamelessly confident.

"As fun as these run in are, I should get back to the tower before anyone else docks me for points. Besides, you lovebirds are having fun. I'll leave you be." She said and sauntered off.

Lily rolled her eyes and James just laughed. He had to love her, even when she was as wild as she was. Lily once asked if they ever snogged. Marlene only said James wishes he would be so lucky and James choked on his pumpkin juice. She never wondered again.

They wandered around (checking broom closets) and continued their playful banter. Lily wondered with a slight ache in her heart if this was all they were ever going to get. She knew it was probably her fault for rejecting James in the past but they had been such different people. Neither of them were mature enough. She hadn't even thought of him like that back then! But now…


End file.
